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Writer's pictureGwendolyn J. Jones

What Fills Your Cup?

I hear so many women saying, I’m going to be a better mom this year or a better wife. As I listen to this statement, I think to myself, what does that look like? Cooking more, keeping the house cleaner, spending more time with the kids?

As women we give so much. I love that about us, we have huge hearts and we will give and give and give until we have nothing left. We will build others up while we are falling apart. We will give so others can prosper, even if it means we go without. We continuously pour into others, but we forget to fill our own cup!


My thought is, what happens when everyone elses cup is full and your cup is empty? We become tired, burned out and irritable. We ALL KNOW what a women with an empty cup looks like!


Why, because we’ve trained everyone around us to constantly take, but now, we have nothing else to give!

This does not have to be the case! We should continue to pour into others, that’s pure genetics. Caring, loving, giving and building is what we do! And NO ONE does it like we do.

But there must be balance? Why are we so good at caring for others and terrible at caring for ourselves? Who takes care of us while we take care of everyone else?

I believe if we as women would learn to care for ourselves WHILE we care for others, then we would automatically be better wives, mothers and honestly our BEST selves!

So my question to you ladies is, what fills your cup? What do you like, what relaxes you? What do you do that’s just for you? What gives you your “win?” For me, it’s baking and decorating, an hour of uninterrupted TV with my favorite cup of hot tea and my favorite dessert or time to write this blog in peace. Even something as simple as an hour of silence, time for me to sit with my feelings, listen to my bible, sort through some of the madness that is my life, or read a book. All these things are what I call my “WIN.” The items listed above may seem insignificant to you, but this is what fills my cup and honestly, the reason I can keep going!

COJ Challenge: Dedicate some time to discovering what may fill your cup. What gives you value? What makes you smile? It may be painting, writing, reading, cooking or time to do absolutely nothing. This may take a bit of trial and error, but it’s important, YOU MUST FIND YOUR “WIN.”

I’d like to suggest that consistently scheduling time to fill your own cup is how you become a better you!

Make it a priority, put yourself on your calendar and do what’s necessary to make this happen. Let’s go ahead and deal with the guilt factor that we all face. Taking time for yourself may seem selfish, but trust me when your cup is full, everyone around you will notice. Same result if your cup is empty, people will notice. So tell yourself, “I’m a better wife and mother WHEN I TAKE BREAKS! I’m taking this time for me now, so that I can be what I need to be for everyone else later! It will be weird at first, but when you see the difference, you’ll get over it!

I love you family, take some time for you, it’s best for everyone! 💕


I dedicate this blog post to Dr. Inaia Phoenix, a bold, brave, beautiful soul! P.S. Filling your own cup is step 1 in the COJ “Be Your Best You” program. Step 2 is training the takers around you to help you … but that’s a whole other blog post. 💜

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